Art by Kevin Wada |
“In the end, the thing that makes him a hero isn’t being able to freeze enemies with a flick of his wrist - it’s the courage to be himself.”
For years Bobby was the laughable lothario, dating and breaking up with women as often as X-Men die and are resurrected. He was known to be terrible at relationships, never taking them seriously. But, when his younger self is brought to the future and comes out, the older Bobby is thrust out of the closet.
Iceman meets young Iceman who decides to come out |
Why should you read it?
Modern dating sucks |
This is such a touching, real, and beautifully arced story about accepting who you really are with people who expect you to be something else.
Marvel comics, and X-Men in particular, have always reflected the very real current struggles in society. Civil Rights, immigration, HIV, xenophobia are just a few of the topics that Marvel have weighed in on, promoting tolerance and understanding.
Iceman’s coming out story is so well done – showing the repercussions, revelations and healing that coming out can bring.
“There are super villains getting punched in addition to some hard hitting home truths”
Fact: There’s more support for people coming out now than ever before. However, for many, it’s still a struggle. There’s still fear of persecution but an even bigger fear is “disappointing” other people. There are so many expectations that you, your friends and family, have for your life. To some, being gay, is an end to that promised future.
Young Iceman's first kiss with bf Romeo |
I’d recommend anyone, gay, straight, trans, intersex, religious, or anything else read this. It’s about a journey to embrace who you are and what it’s like to tell the people around you of that new reality. Plus, there’s super villains getting punched in addition to some hard hitting home truths.
Why is this important?
When I was a kid the gay role models out there were nothing like me. Even worse, many were tragic figures who looked on their lives with regret. Being gay was a terrifying death sentence.Here we see a bonafide super hero struggling against something that so many of us do. Iceman shows that even the strongest of us find it difficult to be our authentic selves. It’s a very personal, very real, and very dangerous fight that you aren’t exempt from even if you have super powers. And, in the end, the thing that makes him a hero isn’t being able to freeze enemies with a flick of his wrist - it’s the courage to be himself.
There are many out gay superheroes in the Marvel verse. So, this is not uncharted territory. But, never before has the saga that is the “coming out process”, especially later in life, been so thoughtfully and thoroughly explored.
“Coming out is a journey, a process of small steps and heroic admissions that happen every day.”
This series investigates how Iceman’s personal revelation affects his relationships with his friends, family, exes, his teammates and even his performance as a happy and whole person in the workplace (battle field).
So often coming out is portrayed as a grand gesture, covered in an issue or two as a side story and then we move on. But, really, coming out is a journey, a process of small steps and heroic admissions that happen every day.
And, for some, the first coming out is a genuine battle.
Bobby is no stranger to danger. And the book uses his literal battles against villains as an allegory to the struggle of coming out. It’s a poetic vision of the very real feelings of struggle.
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Coming out later in life is hard!
Kitty Pryde, friend (and former girlfriend) by Kevin Wada |
Like an alcoholic Bobby is dragged around to all of his exes and friends apologising for not telling them (which I don’t agree with). This becomes part of the narrative. Kitty Pryde, Iceman’s ex who is also now his boss, says to his parents "Bobby's had to spend the last few months listening to what everyone thinks about him, processing how we're all affected by something that must be incredibly challenging for him to deal with... no one's really be asking how Bobby is coping." But, even her reaction, before acceptance, was one of hurt and offence that he didn’t come out the ‘right way’ to her.
For many of the people in Iceman’s life, they feel like part of their life was a lie, as if his secret was vindictive. This is so important for people to see – those who are coming out or the people who love them.
When you come out the people in your life have to adjust to the reality of the new you. It would be great if everyone was like, “Whatever, no big deal”. But that’s not the case. It is a big deal, especially the older you get.
For as long as it takes you to come to your truth, the people around you may need time to adjust. It’s not all pride parades and cakes. Sometimes there are very negative and hurtful reactions.
For people to see and understand this is important. It not only helps those who might be facing the same challenge, but also for the people who want to support them.
Changing lives with one simple act
Iceman has always been and will continue to be my favourite superhero. Now, in ways that I never could have imagined as a kid, his story has created in me a sense of excitement and pride. The hero that I connected with, saw much of myself in, is even more like me.I’ve seen how sharing your own story of struggle can help other people. So, it’s reaffirmed my faith in the comics and their ability to uplift and really make changes. And it’s reaffirmed my faith in myself, that the bravery I exhibit every day by just being myself and the work I do to encourage it in others matters.
It’s my hope that somewhere out there is a kid, reading this book, thinking, “If Iceman can do it, so can I.”
Why is Iceman my favourite X-man?
Young Beast and Beast |
Iceman and Beast are actually my favourite two X-men. One is funny, classic boy next door, and can keep your drink cold. He uses humour to combat the issues that plague his life. He’s the geeky, obnoxious little brother of the team - the outsider trying to get in. For as powerful as he is, he was always afraid of that power and downplayed his abilities to try and fit in. I saw a lot of myself in him.
The other, Beast, is big, brainy, brawny and hairy. He’s like the giant blue bear of my dreams. But really, his brutish exterior belied the genius within. His mutation is his agilty and bestial hands and feet. But his greatest power is his mind. I loved that seeming contradiction. His personal struggle resonated with me as a young black kid. There’ve been many situation in my life where people underestimated my intelligence because of the way that I looked.
She's a little be murdery but I still love her |
My other all time X-man is Marrow. She's not a mainstay but there was something about her plight and powers that I identified with. Her powers are spontaneous bone growth that cause constant pain. But, she uses these powers which seem pretty crap to be one of the most vicious fighters. She battled to become the no nonsense leader of the Morlocks. My struggle with hypbermobility syndrome has meant having to live with pain. But I always think, if Marrow can be a badass and get stuff done, so can I. She’s also a little bit insane but I try not to think about that.
And here’s a picture of Colossus with his beard… ‘nuff said.
Tell me you wouldn't |